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A place for my non-novel stories and thoughts






but I'm WEAK...

5/8/2023

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I have a problem. Some would say it's an addiction, but I can quit any time I like. 

Okay, no, it is an addiction.  I can't stop. I NEED to stop.

I've heard for a couple of years now--before my ARCs went out, before I had a publishing deal, even before I had an agent--that it is a Very Bad Idea to read reviews for your book. Because reviews are subjective. Because one shouldn't need external validation. Because reviews are written not for the author but for the benefit of other potential readers of the book.  

See, I KNOW all these things. And still...I'm weak. So freaking weak.

So I've been reading them, ever since the first one came in to the first feedback site. And every day I tell myself, "I'll stop today."

I have checked them AT LEAST three times today.

It's an obsession. The good ones leave me feeling wonderful, and dammit, that's addictive [see above: Need for external validation] [damn me]. Also, I'm a former teacher, used to receiving feedback on what works and what doesn't. And finally, because I want to know how far-fetched it would be to hope that my book will be a big hit.

But the bad reviews--not gonna lie--hurt. I haven't had many outright mean ones, thank heavens, but those are actually easier to write off than the meh ones, in some ways. I know, I know, you can't please all of the people all of the time. Knowing that doesn't stop me from WANTING to.

Anyway, today I pulled up a list of articles about not reading your reviews, and I'm working my way through the list. 
Here are the ones I'm starting with:

Author Mindset: Stop Reading Your Book Reviews | The Creative Penn

The Day I Stopped Reading Reviews

For the Luvva Gawd, Stop Reading Reviews 

We'll see if there's anything magic in there to help me break this terrible and probably destructive habit. Wish me luck!​

Update: These first 3 were all great. I especially got a kick out of the author of the 3rd one reminding me/us of that Bonnie Raitt song I've always loved:
I Can't Make You Love Me

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    Author

    Laura Moher, navigating this new world of writing and publishing her stories.

    Image description: Closeup of an old piece of wood or metal with a heart-shaped cutout in the center. The surface is painted pale blue, but the paint is peeling to reveal bits of the original brown of the surface beneath. The cutout reveals a blank white surface below.

    Photo credit: "A Hole Heart" by cogdogblog is licensed under CC BY 2.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/?ref=openverse.

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